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What motivates you to share your story?  In Rebecca's case, she knew that she couldn't be the only one who struggled to conceive.  She and her husband tried to become pregnant for several years before putting away the idea and beginning to consider adoption.  To say that they were surprised several months later when Rebecca became pregnant would be an understatement.  In this episode, Rebecca reveals her struggle, her faith, and her eventual success.  She shares her story to provide comfort to those who, like her, have experienced deep hurt over infertility.   

Show Notes

-Rebecca and her husband were married in 2013

-Because they were 34 and 35, they both thought it would be possible that they could struggle with becoming pregnant, so they began trying soon after their marriage.

-Rebecca discusses the incredible discomfort after getting off her birth control- she likens it to going through withdrawals.  Her body was acting as though it was pregnant when she knew she was not.

-She discusses the grief and pain she felt as all of the newlywed couples around her so easily go pregnant, while she and her husband struggled and received the news that IVF was going to be their best option.

-Rebecca says she learned that she had to trust the Lord, and he took her to a place where in December of 2015, she remembers realize her self-worth was not tied up in motherhood, her career, or even womanhood.  Rather, her self-worth was completely tied up in God.

-She remembers making a facebook post on December 12, 2015 stating that she had peace and had come to terms with her journey…. And exactly one year from that date, December 12, 2016 Rebecca gave birth to her first son.

-At that point (Dec 2015), they had decided that they were going to stop trying and pursue adoption.

-In April of 2016 Rebecca returned from a conference feeling rather “crummy.”  She assumed she had picked some type of bug up on the trip.  Her nursing coworkers begged her to take a pregnancy test.  She finally did, and it was positive!

-“I choose to speak about the infertility, because so many women feel like they’re alone, and feel like they’re the only one walking this path…. And they’re not.”

-Rebecca was seeing an OB at the time, but decided to switch to a homebirth midwife.  She connected very deeply with her midwife and had an amazing prenatal experience

-Labor, however did not go according to plan: She went into labor around 10:00 on a Friday night.  By 3:00 am, everything had stopped.  Contractions were completely gone.  This lasted all day Saturday and into Sunday afternoon.  She did everything she could to get labor to progress: Walking, birthing ball, position changes… nothing would get contractions to come back consistently.

-On Sunday afternoon, Rebecca decided she needed to get out of the house and walk (in the freezing cold!!).

-By 11:30pm on Sunday night, Rebecca was at 8 cm.  After hitting 8 cm, she once again would not progress. 

-By 9:00 am, Rebecca’s midwife mentioned to her that it might be time to head to the hospital to receive some rest with an epidural, and Rebecca agreed.

-She went to the hospital, received the epidural, was able to sleep for several hours, and then was able to push her baby out by 6:00 that evening.

-With her second child, she found out that she was pregnant in a very interesting way!  After having a fall through a step in her house, she began taking Motrin for the pain. A few days in, she had the random thought, “Maybe I shouldn’t be taking this Motrin… Maybe I should take a pregnancy test.” No other symptoms, yet the test came back positive!

- For their second birth, Rebecca’s mother came over in the morning to pick up her 2-year-old, as she keeps him while Rebecca works. 

-At 7:30 am Rebecca was having small contractions that were irregular and not very timeable.  This continued until about 2:00 pm.

-At 2:00 contractions quickly began to become consistent, longer, stronger and closer together.

-With things suddenly moving so quickly, Rebecca was worried her midwife might not make it!  When she heard her midwife’s voice in the house, she was completely relieved and ready.

-Within 10 minutes, Rebecca had the baby!

-She had no tearing, no complications, and Donovan was wide awake and crying when he was born.

-“I was on such a high after it was all over—that I had done it—completely at home, completely unmedicated.”

-Her second birth was 11 hours, start to finish.

-When describing the emotions after she gave birth, Rebecca says, “it was both powerful and euphoric all at the same time.”

-Rebecca and her midwife laugh about the fact that they’ve had the birth pool set up twice and never used it… this time she gave birth on the couch!

-When commenting on her story, particularly with infertility, Rebecca says, “There is power in knowing that you’re not alone.”


Episode Round-up:

  1. Have faith in the hard times
  2. Sharing your story, even the struggle, removes the crippling grip of isolation and builds stronger communal bonds
  3. Open communication and trust in your care provider are key to a successful birth
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